Revision: A clarified paragraph

Okay, another lesson in editing. No lecture with this one. I am simply going to present the first draft and then the edited paragraph.

From: "The History of Mardon Castle" by Roby Ward (being presented on other web sites).
A flash of lightning revealed another figure. The sight took her by surprise because most of the rain that fell was not associated with a storm. Clouds would simply gather and drop their water. Terniff looked up to the sky hoping to time the next shaft of light, but found herself wondering about the flash of lightning that did momentarily illuminate the land. She also considered it strange seeing another because of a belief that Helshain's personal section of the surrounding land was a private and holy place, so not a locale where those uninvited, especially ghosts, could come.

edited
A flash of lightning revealed another figure. The sight took her by surprise because she had not associated the rain with a storm. Clouds would simply gather in Mardon and drop their water. A rumble of distant thunder let the lady know that this rain was part of a normal weather system, and not simply a part of the curse upon the land. Terniff looked up to the sky hoping for another shaft of light, but found herself wondering whether her earlier vision had been real. Her experience of dealing with illusions in the past war made her immediately question what her eyes had momentarily seen. What troubled her more was that she considered it strange seeing what she felt had been Telelum, because of a belief that Helshain's personal section of the surrounding land was a private and holy place, so not a locale where those uninvited, especially ghosts, could come.

strange story

The Edit is much better.