Dilemma of Dreams - 7B

An adult speculative Christian post-Armageddon fiction
Dilemma of Dreams
Chapter Seven: Part Two
I Wonder about My Life

I saw a more playful side to Peralte that evening. There was a slab of venison roasting over a fire with blankets and the chests set in proper places. The pond was clear, but very cold. As Assadra stood on the edge of the water mentioning a need to fill a pot with water and place it by the fire, Peralte rushed her and sent them both deep into the frigid liquid. Assadra came up screaming, but Peralte held her speaking of how her body reacted to the chill. She spoke curses, threats, and called him all sorts of names, only to have Peralte do things to keep her in the water. When they finally came from the pond, they laughed and laughed until going off together with words of warming each other up.

Again I heard their voices speaking of their pleasure in being with each other. I looked at the dress covering my form understanding that the body beneath was not yet ready for claiming time with Peralte. The venison was good, as was the wine, so I found myself able to relax while listening to two adults again active with each other.

As things grew quiet, I wandered up to the pond thinking of taking a swim. The sound of a splash caused me to stand from running my hand through the cold liquid as my eyes looked for trouble. Instead of a regular predator, Assadra swam to me, then rose from the water to touch her nipples.

“Do you think that yours will show so well should I throw you in?”

“I doubt it. Mine are nowhere as large as…”

The voice of Peralte loudly spoke from a distance. “Leave her alone, Assadra!”

The lady loudly returned, “I won’t throw her in against her will, like you did!”

Hearing the two laugh caused me to ask a question. “How did he know that he could do that?”

“He didn’t. It however takes things like that to show things about your personality. I cannot say that I enjoyed it, but he made it enjoyable. That works in his favor, but if he kept doing it I would get angry with him.” She pointed off where I had heard Peralte’s voice as she said, “There is a warm pool over there. Go there if you want to bathe.”

I looked at Assadra as I asked, “You enjoy being naked?”

“I enjoy the fact that I can be naked. The breasts will not sag, the body won’t suffer pain, and I cannot get sick. There really is no reason not to go naked. People still have their sensibilities, but I see no reason not to enjoy the benefits of this life.”

“One benefit is supposed to be a lack of work.”

“Go back to Heaven. That however is not a life. Doing things is a part of life.”

Feeling myself in Purgatory, I asked, “I can go back?”

“Well, yes. It was a gift freely given. You got it. It’s there.”

I did like Heaven. There was a place for me, and I thought it grand. The mementoes of my life however caused me to want further experiences with things I had dreamed about. That was why I went to the trouble to design my Western town. When it collapsed I however did not look to Heaven as a refuge, and that troubled me. Desiring some reference for my private feelings, I decided to ask a question.

“Why did you leave? You could have gone around naked in Heaven.”

“Yes, and no. There are moral sensibilities there, but there would also be accommodation. I like going around and challenging people’s perceptions. There are souls in this existence still attempting some comprehension of their selves, and it is fun to force them to deal with my nudity.”

Considering she had made one change to her body, I felt that she may have made others. “Have you ever thought of being a man?”

“No. I am not here for experimentation. Okay, I did take on some cat-like traits, but that was just fun. I know what my body can do, and enjoy having it perform with another that is also knowledgeable. Peralte knows what he is doing. When you finally claim him, he will make it an experience.”

“So I have heard.”

She laughed, then said, “There is nothing to be shy about, Vetacha. That life is over. We chose the right side. Feel free to enjoy the pleasures that come your way.”

The voice of Peralte grew louder as he approached, “I assume that last part was a compliment to me.”

“I guess that it included you. Don’t think you are the only one.”

I saw the two trade a kiss. Peralte then knelt to kiss me as well. I enjoyed the moment of affection, and having the man continue to be near me as he spoke.

“As Assadra said, there is a warm pool over there. It was provided for us, so it is nicer than just a regular body of water. It should be big enough to please you. Since we will be entering town and speaking to people, I will have you bathe in the morning, but no reason to stop you from just enjoying the water now.”

“Can I just stay naked afterwards.”

Assadra replied, “I don’t see why. You have nothing to show.”

“No, but I think that I might try getting used to it.”

Peralte replied, “Do as you please. There is food and drink should you want it.”

The pool was at the right temperature, and large enough that I could take a stroke or two before reaching the other side. No filth covered the bottom, but rounded crystal rocks provided a comfortable place to sit or stand. After enjoying the water for a period, I looked at my body and wondered how much different it truly was. One part of me was definitely nothing like my male body, but I did not see much else that had been altered. I felt a chill in the air as I left the warmth of the pool, and felt my nipples thinking them to be nothing declaring the mounds that they would one day sit on top of.

I went into camp to ask about the makeup kit Peralte said he would buy for me. He mentioned it being in the chest by the blankets. He had to come show it to me, as I had not expected the large box to contain my cosmetics. Feeling overwhelmed by how much I had to learn, I took it and a mirror back to the pool.

Looking at my features, I again noted that I saw few differences in my present appearance and what I remembered of myself when I was this age once before. I felt that my jaw had indeed been more pronounced, but otherwise I could see the person that I once had been. Just putting on some lipstick however scared me. The face of a female almost immediately came to the image in the mirror. I wiped my lips clean, then looked again. I saw the same features as before, although came to the realization that I would truly grow to become a lady. The cosmetics altered nothing, but enhanced what natural features were developing.

I stopped and thought for a while about what had happened to me, and what was happening to me. Memories of passing Peralte and only seeing him as a more respected associate were compared to recent events where I enjoyed his touch and laughed at his antics. I then realized that I did have eternity looming before me. My few years of intense labor had been the right thing to do, and now I could claim the reward. It was not the life of ease that I imagined, but I was enjoying it. I had however come into this life with little depth to my experiences. I really could not stand next to Peralte as a man, as his antics with Assadra would be just as mystifying. Thinking about what I heard between the two, I felt safer with Peralte. The lady would want a man that knew how to handle her, and I could not be that. Peralte was willing to teach, if I was willing to take the time and effort to learn. I thus put on the lipstick, worked with my eyebrows, and did other things to declare to others that I was indeed a female.

Upon returning to the camp, Peralte declared, “Whoa, Vetacha, don’t grow up too fast.”

I could not help but smile as I asked, “Do you like the look?”

“No, but it is a better application than I expected.”

“I spent the last twenty plus years around women. I had seen many girls go through the steps of having themselves appear attractive. I cannot say that I paid the best attention, but after that much time I would hope that I learned something.”

Assadra said, “You look like a young lady that has played with cosmetics. It is on way too thick with colors that are much too bright. Still, get used to it.” She looked to Peralte to say, “I will help her in the morning.”

I put the makeup kit back into the chest, then sat next to the man while asking the lady, “What else do I need to do?”

“Nothing really. There are benefits to this life, but I can let you in on those when I apply your makeup in the morning.”

I just spoke, but not specifically to either of my elders. “Besides between my legs, I really felt that I looked no different now than I had in my first life. I dressed differently, and my hair had been allowed to grow, but otherwise I felt myself the same. When I began to put on the makeup however, I could tell that I was now a girl.”

Peralte said, “Well, the statement that the clothes make the man can apply to women and cosmetics as well.”

I actually looked to Assadra as I said, “I really know nothing of being a woman. Cannot say that I know much about being a man either. Each day of my previous life was just hard work from dawn to dusk. I cannot say that I remember much of it, except wishing and wishing to have a day of rest. I think that there were a few, but I slept through them.”

She replied, “Well, you missed the rough parts of being a woman. There is really nothing bad about it now. Sounds like you only had the rough parts of being a man. Still, if you prefer spending your eternity enjoying life as a girl instead of a man, I would say that you are making a good decision.”

Peralte said, “I don’t think she plans on staying a girl for eternity.”

I confirmed the statement. “No, I am going to grow up. I spent three years working to learn about being a female acolyte, and I guess that now I have to spend three years learning about becoming a woman.”

He had an arm come around me to hug me as he said, “See, a little bit of effort can pay off. It is really not that bad, and the reward can be great.”

Assadra commented, “He’s bragging now.”

“Keeping her spirits up.”

“You have to keep the spirits up.”

The two began making comments to each other that I did not understand. I however heard the joy in their voices and the pleasant expressions on their faces. I also heard them laugh. Wanting to someday be able to fully share in the exchange, I listened while simply enjoying the pleasant emotions.