What Changes People.

I have heard about many things that change people for the worst. being abused or taken advantage of makes people embittered, and things like that. Being hurt by a lover makes you want to have nothing to do with love, etc, etc, etc.

Mainly a bad event leads to people becoming "Less opening and less giving"

What kind of events or something would "Open Someone's Eyes" to the evil around them and the wrongness of their own actions.

The simple question is: What would make a inconsiderate and embittered person become a caring loving person?

I know religion is a big one for this, but I can't use religion, or more to the point, I don't want to use religion in my story , I want to use the actions of people upon people.

Like the same way people go from caring open compassionate people to embittered untrusting people by the actions of those around them

Any help would be greatly appriciated.

As an 'inconsiderate and embittered person' let me make my statement. I am neither inconsiderate or embittered. I simply consider myself guarded. The pain that I suffered I do not want to suffer again. I thus am now more cautious before I consider the feelings of others. I am not bitter, simply shielded against feeling your pain until I feel certain that I can ease your suffering without undue suffering in return.

I am here. I am open. I am among the masses. I choose my battles however, and feel no shame should I decline to volunteer. You might consider me 'inconsiderate and embittered,' although there are others that find me compassionate and caring. It is all a matter of perspective. Stop being cruel to me and those I do respond to. I might not be YOUR knight in shining armor, but I do try to be A knight in shining armor. Be glad that I am out there not making this world a more miserable place, and go look elsewhere for your own salvation.

I don't think in all reality people do actually change. I mean for example, I know someone who had a profound change in religious views, the one example you gave, but he's still the same cocky know-it-all ass he was before. Only his target for abuse and the name he prays to has changed... actually one target for his abuse hasn't changed all that greatly. We fought like cats and dogs before and we fight like cats and dogs now.

But for fictional purposes the old making them face up to and deal with the pain they are causing works nicely. A Christmas Carol is a good example of this, but you naturally don't need ghost and time travel to make it work.

TrishD: No offense, but I am confused as to what you are tying to say.

Hydra: Sadly I have hit the same road blocks on this issue as you have. It seems that all changes that have influenced people seem to be about generating a lack of compassion and trust towards people, never the other way around.

I suppose the "Christmas Carrol" might work, but also seemed to involve a "Godlike" persona (Ghosts) to execute the effect.

I suppose I am seeking the same effect as an outlook change that comes from accepting a new world view or discovering a higher purpose in life, discovering the effect of your own actions, etc, etc, which as it stands seems to only come from religious experiences or something akin them, with out the religious influence. Which is now making me wonder if that is even plausible.

Sadly I kinda want to play into the realm of real people with real actions.

I suppose I could use a "God" if it comes to that.

Oooo yah :: Edit :: in case I have not mentioned this, I am asking this question to get an idea for a situation for my MC to "wake up" and realize the evils of his own actions.

I don't think there has to be a supernatural element to a story of someone facing up to the harm their actions have caused.

There have been several television talk shows that have done it. You know made KKK members go live with a black family for a week or put thin people who make fun of overweight people in fat suits and paraded them around town.

The courts and judges have also tried their hands at this tactic as well. I recall a recent case where a drunk driver was forced to live with the photo of crash victim displayed in their home. Slum lords have been forced to live in run down apartments... I think that one might have even been made into a movie.

You really don't have to look to far for real life examples of this sort of thing being attempted.

OOo those are very good examples of things. Yah, that Fat suit thing would be very ideal for what I am thinking about. The Proverbial "Chink in the Armor"

Thank you, I was looking for RL examples that one hits the nail on the head for me.